yaw: an erratic deflection from an intended course

My Dad passed away exactly a month ago. I was working in Italy when I found out and had just seen him a few weeks before. His death was unexpected and left me with so many things I still wanted to say.

He was a great man, the type of person that touched everyone he met. I will never be able to express in words what a special person he was, and certainly do not have enough space here, but my brother created a website in his honor www.jimwhowell.com . Many people have shared their stories and have truly captured what an amazing person he was. I imagine he will continue to inspire people through the life he led.

I know that he will always be my greatest hero and one who has set the mark for how I will try to live my life. That, without a doubt, is the greatest gift he has given to me.

My Dad did everything, and did it well; but one of his greatest passions was aviation. He spent 9 years in our garage building a most beautiful, perfect, RV-4. I spent many hours talking with Dad as he puttered away on the airplane. Okay, mostly I played around and got in the way, but nonetheless, I "helped".
Once he finished "The Mistress" I spent perfect Wyoming mornings cruising along the Wind Rivers and holding my breath as we looped and rolled and stalled and buzzed the house. Needless to say, his love of aviation has been contagious.

I am now beginning my journey in aviation and am pursuing my private pilot's license. It is something I have always wanted to do but the timing was never right...until now. I had hoped my Dad would be the one to do the final check ride, but his time here ended too soon. I titled this post "Yaw" because his death has sent my life in a new direction different from my intended course.

As I have begun my lessons I have found myself wishing I could ask him questions or share my fears, my excitement and my successes (and hopefully only minor failures). I intend to post all of those thoughts here...not only to document my experience but also to share stories about Dad. My goal is to one day fly "The Mistress" and carry on his tradition. He was always passionate about introducing others, especially kids, to the beauty of flight. I promise to do the same.

This is my "Aviation Therapy".

My dear friends Bernoulli and Newton

**I'm going to write these as if they were letters to Dad because these are all of the things I would want to say**

I was able to get my first flight in today but before that had spent a couple of days going through some of the ground training. The weather in Chicago is its usual... predictably crappy. The amount of wind, lack of visibility and temperature spreads are less than ideal for an amateur like myself. I'm starting to think I have my own personal bad weather system that follows me as the weather is usually good one day before and one day after I have my training.

My instructor, Chris, is a young guy...probably close to my age. In fact, most of the people at Windy City are young, ambitious pilots eager to move up the ladder. I find myself picturing you during your time as a pilot in training and I wonder what it was like for you. I think you would really like Chris and the group at the school in general. They truly love their job but don't take themselves too seriously. However, I'm still trying to break them in on my sense of humor...

...The first day we went out to the airplane to go over a pre-flight inspection. As we opened the canopy to climb in the cockpit, I looked at Chris and said "I step directly on the wing, right?" Now if there is one cardinal rule...it is DON'T STEP ON THE WING. Of course I know this, but the look in Chris's eye when I said this suggested my face had been too deadpan. I'm still working on him.

After the first day, I purchased all of my student pilot books and promised to study ever so diligently while I was away in Holland. I did study of course and found myself eating it up. I feel like the timing of this is perfect as my chemical engineering background helps my tiny brain wrap around the concept of flight. I find it hard to believe that I will ever read and know the FAR/AIM 2009 edition by heart, but I'm sure you did...and I think about how amazing that is.

Speaking of flight, and the theory behind it...Chris and I spent some time going over basic aerodynamics and how the plane pitches, rolls and yaws. As he is talking and drawing pictures on the board I can tell he was nervous. I start to wonder if I'm one of his first students and what it must be like to teach people to fly. He's explaining to me in simple terms, Bernoulli's theory for lift and Newton's thought on forces. For a few moments I found it very difficult not to raise my hand and say "I already know this, Bernoulli and I go way back...Fluids 101". During this time I was also thinking that you and I would have had a great conversation about lift and why planes fly. I know you would have been the master at teaching this concept.

As Chris is teaching, it occurs to me that we will learn a lot from eachother as I pursue my license. I realize that it is really important for me to just take in all that he has to say, and for me to challenge him and ask questions and to just trust him. It will be my first time in a small plane with anyone besides you and I know that if you were here you would have words of wisdom about what to look for in a pilot and certainly you would have an anecdote about what it's like to be a CFI.

The other part of yesterday's ground training was weather. I don't disclose the fact that I used to come downstairs to the basement while you downloaded DUATS information before a flight and explained what we were looking for. I'm trying to battle the "My Dad does this" reflex because I know that once again it's important for me to let him take the wheel and teach it to me as he knows how.

We use an aviation weather website which has METARS, TAFS and FAs and cover all the information that is given. At one point we come to one of the remarks (RMK) and I ask Chris about one of them and the meaning. He was unsure and mentioned that for the most part he found the details of weather to be quite boring. This may be true, but I knew that you would be able to explain to me that portion of the remarks and that you would even make it sound interesting, would probably know a little history about it. That was one of the best things about you, you always dove deep into whatever you were doing and made sure to know the inner workings. Even the apparent mundane weather remarks. Every day I miss that about you.

I also asked him about the temperature dew point spread...being an engineer I wanted some quantitative information. I know we had talked about this one crisp Wyoming morning. I only wish I could remember what you said. At the time I was a teenager up early on a Saturday morning and probably wasn't thinking of the weather...or the dew point.

I spent the evening reading the manual for the DA-20 trying to envision my first takeoffs and landings...and how the hell am I going to keep all of these numbers in check. The truth is, there is no way I will be able to manage it all, at least not at first. It's hard for me to imagine that you were ever unsure about your skills as a pilot but I'm sure you would know just the right thing to say.

I was really nervous before I went to bed, the night before the first flight...but I slept perfectly. Maybe you would have said "just get some rest, you will feel better about it in the morning". So I did.

First Flight--sure I can steer with my feet

Chicago seemed to finally break free of "perma-winter" and the weather was nice enough to fly yesterday.

Chris and I had a pre-flight briefing and talked about what we would do, or attempt to do during the flight. Just the basics-- taxiing, take off, shallow turns, climbs, landing. Simple enough right?

We began with pre-flight inspection, this time Chris let me take charge. I understand that the plane is used for training and takes a punishing, but i can't help but think that you would never let the RV sit outside year-round and certainly wouldn't let the bugs set on the plane. As we do the inspection I realize that it's very similar to the inspections we do on vessels for work. Just making sure nothing is loose or suspicious. I still wonder if I will ever have the know-how and confidence to know what I'm looking for and to be a good pilot...but i know it just takes time and I'm trying to be patient. I remember watching you as you did your inspection and how thorough you always were, never left any stone unturned.

Let me divert by saying that I took a pottery class in high school. The most important part of making pottery on a wheel is the first part...centering. I couldn't center to save my life. If someone did it for me then I could create a masterpiece. I have discovered that centering is much like taxiing for airplanes. You can't do much else without being able to taxi.

As a child, I used to do EVERYTHING with my feet. We are talking, didn't crawl...I rolled. I even used to hold my bottle with my feet. This would naturally lead one to believe that steering with my feet would come naturally. Right...

After completing all of the pre flight requirements we start the engine and away we go. Chris leads us out of the crowded area and then turns me loose on the rudder pedals and brakes. I can only say that it's a good thing that the taxi way is as wide as it is. I was swerving all over the place. It would have been highly beneficial, and easier on Chris's heart, if I had bumpers on either end of the taxiway. He told me it's not the worst he has seen but I'm not convinced.

After take-off Chris shows what happens to the airplane if you don't use rudder to correct for the effect of the prop spinning. I realize that I've never experienced this before because your take-offs were always flawless. Gosh I have a lot to learn...

I forgot to mention that this flight was right after lunch. And that, coupled with windy conditions and my nerves makes for a nauseous time. Especially when Chris lets go of the controls and starts fiddling with the chart.

I remember you always telling me not to "over fly" the plane and how when you come across turbulence to let the plane adjust itself. "The plane wants to fly" you would say. This is probably much easier to do when you aren't tense, nervous and nauseous! I realize that even though we are getting bumped around and an amateur has control of the stick, Chris is still completely calm. I guess I can't be scaring him too much.

I can picture you with your hands in your lap when you used to let me do turns...and now I realize you were secretly pushing the rudder pedals to coordinate my turns. Of course, you would never tell me that...instead you would just praise my skills and give me the confidence that I could do it. This was just how you always were...no matter what it was you could convince someone they could do it.

While in flight, we were looking at the chart to determine if we were going to intrude on O'hare. As I looked at the chart I was thinking about all of your quirky stories from working at Jeppesen. Again I just wanted to say "MY DAD MADE THOSE". I also remembered how you went out with all the young guys for one of their birthdays and took too many Irish Car Bombs. I guess you really "whooped it up".

After we did a few climbs and shallow turns we went back to the airport and haphazardly taxied back into position. I think I only almost ran us off the runway once on the way back. Small victory. I would be lying if I said I wasn't grateful as I could finally relax. But oddly enough, after all of that I can't wait to go back the next day.

The Admiral

I digress for a minute to tell the story of my trip to Scotland. It was one of those trips I won't soon forget.

I had had a rough week, especially the two days leading up to my trip. I was forgetful, couldn't focus, couldn't sleep, couldn't complete a task and could barely hold it together to make it through the day. I was anxious about the trip wondering if I would be able to pull it off.

I survived the endless security line and was crossing my fingers for an upgrade to business or at least an aisle to myself. I would have even just settled for a working tv so that I would have an 8 hour distraction.

I wasn't able to get an upgrade and proceeded to my assigned seat, again hoping for some space. I didn't really want to be alone but didn't really want to sit next to someone who wasn't "just right".

I found my seat and the guy sharing the row was probably not pleased that I had sneaked on at the last minute. After I was seated, the gentleman in my row and myself spent several minutes laughing at a guy in the aisle trying to slam the overhead compartment closed. Slam it harder! That will fix the fact that the suitcase is too big for the space!

As we talked I discovered that he was going to Bahrain and I to Scotland. I jumped to the conclusion that he was one of those business men living the high life in the highly promoted Bahrain. But why would he be in Economy Plus?

I discovered that he was, in fact, in the Navy and was...a pilot. Or...Naval Aviator. I ever so proudly exclaimed "I'm taking flying lessons!". He chuckled warmly and asked how many hours I had...not that anyone is counting but I replied..."4.4". So as we took off he said "well with your 4.4 hours I bet we can check to make sure he gets the flaps up". And then we talked about the tabs on the wing and how they were venturis. Poor guy, I was trying to talk shop with him.

We spent the next 3 hours talking solidly about...everything. We talked about toll booths, soy beans, Costco, Power Point, WALL-E, Fat People, Six Sigma (Did you know the Navy does Six Sigma? Poor Bastards), being shot at in an airplane...we literally covered the whole spectrum. I learned a lot about him in this time. I learned that he was an Admiral in the Navy and that he used to fly fighters and land on air craft carriers. I had to pry this out of him as he was very modest about it. No big deal. He lands and takes off in 450 ft in a fighter. It takes me 1000 ft in a Diamond. I couldn't help but ask "What's it like to land on a carrier?"

We had just had a discussion about toll booth operators and were giggling like school kids and he said "Well...it's kind of like driving through a toll booth at 150 miles per hour with no lights on". Hey....that's all the perspective I need.

He was a guy from Philly, he had the thick blue collar Philly accent. He joined the Navy after wearing out working for the Teamsters. He had run into a neighbor kid who had joined and whose excuse was..."Hey man I'm going for the girls in grass skirts". The now Admiral joined the next day, he told me later that he has yet to see the grass skirts. Six months later he ran into the same kid, this time in the chow hall but the kid was filling out papers. "What are you doing?" the Admiral asked. "Man, I'm going to school, I guess they do your laundry there." The Admiral told me that he did laundry that night "I f***ing hate doing laundry" he said and signed up for the Naval Academy the next day. No big deal.

He continued on in the Navy and flew fighters and then reconnaissance missions and is now based in Japan. This led to a conversation about travel we exchanged travel stories.

I shared the story of the time Tonya and I spent 24 hours in a bus holding the toilet shut and having scalding water splash on me, he shared stories of parasites in Saudi. I had him rolling on the floor laughing, he had me cringing at the thought of a parasite. I of course had to ask how his karaoke skills were, being based in Japan. "Oh I'm good, but everyone thinks they're good eight beers in." I asked what his specialty song was to which he replied, "Well, you know, You've Lost that Loving Feeling is a big one for us. And then of course I like a little Frank Sinatra".

He was surprised at the fact I didn't have a home in Chicago and that I really did just live out of a suitcase. "How does one end up being from Wyoming? And how did you end up here?" I was surprised at his curiosity considering he has seen so much and certainly seen people come in from all over the country to join the Navy. He even took an interest in the mundane life of a refinery.

We bitched about power point and peoples' presentation skills. He spoke about his Dad loading up on toilet paper when a storm was coming. "Just shows how many assholes there are in the world when people are loading up on toilet paper," the Admiral said.

I gave him grief about being an admiral and stuffed in economy. He said "yeah they won't let me upgrade, it's considered a perk. That's why you got to trick yourself out". He started showing me his gadgets...including his "space age" foam seat approved by NASA. This toy came about after a flight on air India where the padding had been removed and he was forced to sit on metal. This was the same flight where they landed and he said "I couldn't tell if we had landed or been shot down". He also spoke about being shot at in the first Iraq war.

The conversation continued on and I was surprised at how fast the time went and how grateful I was that he was there. I wanted to tell him what a savior he had been for me but the timing was never right. He had really eased my discomfort and calmed my fears on the flight. He also seemed to know a little bit about everything. In talking about soybeans he was in complete awe of what it takes to be a farmer. "I could never figure that out". His modesty was sincere though I'm sure if you can do what he does, you can figure out farming.

We slept a bit and chatted as we were served the scrumptious airplane breakfast and as we landed I realized we had never exchanged names. It didn't really matter, I suppose. It's unlikely I will ever see him again. But as he pulled his bag down and I realized that I should have known his name, and probably should have guessed it. It was marked in perfect military fashion on his bag and it was...Jim.

I could tell that he was kind of a Maverick in the Navy and not the stereotypical rigid type. Someone who does what he wants to and gains respect by doing so. I was so affected by my experience that I looked him up when I got to my hotel in Scotland. His biography can be found at the following link....http://www.navy.mil/navydata/bios/navybio.asp?bioID=391

Ummmm FIVE THOUSAND hours of flight time?

I made it to Scotland safely and found myself in the middle of an absolutely wonderful day. Blue skies all around, no cloud in the sky and perfect temperatures. This was the first day in a loooong time, people said.

I can't help but think Dad had some part in this so...Thank You, Dad.

Lakeshore Flight--Too Easy!

My second flight with Chris was probably too easy and probably a waste of money...but I loved it all the same. After my flight the day before, I could go for easy.

We decided to fly South down the lakeshore and to the city. This was a tricky undertaking because O'Hare takes up a huge amount of airspace at low altitudes and because there was a Cubs game going on. For some reason the FAA doesn't want us "loitering" around Wrigley as if we are the GoodYear Blimp and O'Hare wouldn't think too highly of us in their space. So we cruised over the lake taking care to not piss anyone off. "Please just keep me below 1900 for the first part," Chris said.

I remember how much you wanted a transponder and now I understand why. In Lander, it's pretty much free range...keep your eye out for others and "Squawk" to let people know you're there. In any other area where there is any sort of traffic it's important to listen to what's going on and communicate with nearby ATC. Even for uncontrolled airports it's good to get on their frequency in case anyone is in the pattern. I guess this was an integral part of you being able to make your trips to Casper and Denver. I'm awful on the radio but that's a story for another time.

As we flew down the shore I was just in awe of what an incredible view we had. The top of the Hancock tower had nothing on us. The weather was perfect, the lake was blue green and the skyline was clear. Oh how I wanted to tell you about it. I'm not sure Chris and I said much to eachother. We were too busy taking in the view. The key aspect of Visual Flight Rules (VFR) is to be looking outside most of the time and checking instruments only a small portion of the time. Let's say look out for 15 seconds, check instruments for 5 seconds. On days like today it was easy.

We flew past Meigs, a since closed airfield, that is right on the lakefront near the city. It now houses some of Chicago's attractions but I'm sure you would have known about it when I brought it up. What a cool place to land, right on the lake!

Chris decided to break the zone and push me a little bit. He had requested an altitude of 2600, I was holding at 2700 feet. "I wouldn't normally say anything but you are doing a great job of holding altitude and if you can hold at 100+ you can hold at 0". Yes, sir.

We had struggled through that conversation because I couldn't hear Chris very well, which brings me to my next point.

I also remember how much you wanted your BOSE headset. I'd always known the great quality of BOSE but I'm not sure I really appreciated what a difference it makes. I have been using some of the ones they lend at Windy City...and let me tell ya, I took a punishing. I couldn't hear a word that Chris was saying and the darn thing was digging into my lumpy head. When you're trying to avoid upsetting ATC at O'Hare, this can become an issue. I'm sure you have gone through the same experience and I can guarantee you I will soon be getting a headset that doesn't leave a mark.

The time passed too quickly and it was time to land. As we were on final approach Chris began with "You see those four lights down there next to the runway...". I couldn't help myself I said "yeah, that's the glideslope indicator, looks like we're coming in too high". Chris looked at me in surprise, and I, in turn, was probably looking at him in surprise. I wasn't sure where that came from. And then I remembered...

...We took a couple of night flights and on one of those we did a few "touch-n-gos" at the Riverton airport. This is where we first talked about the glideslope indicator. "You see those lights, we're looking for one to be white and one to be red and then we know that we're coming in just right". Of course I never got to see the alternative because your approach and landing was perfect. That night I know we talked a lot about IFR flights and I only hope some of those tricks of the trade will come to me as my pursuit of flight progresses.

As we landed I also remember you telling me something shortly after I told you I was going to take lessons. I found the email so I will quote you directly:

"also, not to be gender-biased...but i found female students more fun
to teach because they didn't have that testosterone impulse to act
like they knew more than they did. and you have a head start although
you don't realize it yet."

I guess I really had absorbed more than I ever thought and am ever so grateful that I had a head start. I'm not sure I'd be able to do what I'm doing without your help. Thank you.


SIDENOTE: One of Chris's comments in our time together and during a discussion about airspace "Man, now that Obama is President he messes up everything!" I know we would have had a laugh about this because we definitely had discussions about air space when the President is anywhere on the...planet basically. I know you wouldn't have minded re-routing for Obama.