The Admiral

I digress for a minute to tell the story of my trip to Scotland. It was one of those trips I won't soon forget.

I had had a rough week, especially the two days leading up to my trip. I was forgetful, couldn't focus, couldn't sleep, couldn't complete a task and could barely hold it together to make it through the day. I was anxious about the trip wondering if I would be able to pull it off.

I survived the endless security line and was crossing my fingers for an upgrade to business or at least an aisle to myself. I would have even just settled for a working tv so that I would have an 8 hour distraction.

I wasn't able to get an upgrade and proceeded to my assigned seat, again hoping for some space. I didn't really want to be alone but didn't really want to sit next to someone who wasn't "just right".

I found my seat and the guy sharing the row was probably not pleased that I had sneaked on at the last minute. After I was seated, the gentleman in my row and myself spent several minutes laughing at a guy in the aisle trying to slam the overhead compartment closed. Slam it harder! That will fix the fact that the suitcase is too big for the space!

As we talked I discovered that he was going to Bahrain and I to Scotland. I jumped to the conclusion that he was one of those business men living the high life in the highly promoted Bahrain. But why would he be in Economy Plus?

I discovered that he was, in fact, in the Navy and was...a pilot. Or...Naval Aviator. I ever so proudly exclaimed "I'm taking flying lessons!". He chuckled warmly and asked how many hours I had...not that anyone is counting but I replied..."4.4". So as we took off he said "well with your 4.4 hours I bet we can check to make sure he gets the flaps up". And then we talked about the tabs on the wing and how they were venturis. Poor guy, I was trying to talk shop with him.

We spent the next 3 hours talking solidly about...everything. We talked about toll booths, soy beans, Costco, Power Point, WALL-E, Fat People, Six Sigma (Did you know the Navy does Six Sigma? Poor Bastards), being shot at in an airplane...we literally covered the whole spectrum. I learned a lot about him in this time. I learned that he was an Admiral in the Navy and that he used to fly fighters and land on air craft carriers. I had to pry this out of him as he was very modest about it. No big deal. He lands and takes off in 450 ft in a fighter. It takes me 1000 ft in a Diamond. I couldn't help but ask "What's it like to land on a carrier?"

We had just had a discussion about toll booth operators and were giggling like school kids and he said "Well...it's kind of like driving through a toll booth at 150 miles per hour with no lights on". Hey....that's all the perspective I need.

He was a guy from Philly, he had the thick blue collar Philly accent. He joined the Navy after wearing out working for the Teamsters. He had run into a neighbor kid who had joined and whose excuse was..."Hey man I'm going for the girls in grass skirts". The now Admiral joined the next day, he told me later that he has yet to see the grass skirts. Six months later he ran into the same kid, this time in the chow hall but the kid was filling out papers. "What are you doing?" the Admiral asked. "Man, I'm going to school, I guess they do your laundry there." The Admiral told me that he did laundry that night "I f***ing hate doing laundry" he said and signed up for the Naval Academy the next day. No big deal.

He continued on in the Navy and flew fighters and then reconnaissance missions and is now based in Japan. This led to a conversation about travel we exchanged travel stories.

I shared the story of the time Tonya and I spent 24 hours in a bus holding the toilet shut and having scalding water splash on me, he shared stories of parasites in Saudi. I had him rolling on the floor laughing, he had me cringing at the thought of a parasite. I of course had to ask how his karaoke skills were, being based in Japan. "Oh I'm good, but everyone thinks they're good eight beers in." I asked what his specialty song was to which he replied, "Well, you know, You've Lost that Loving Feeling is a big one for us. And then of course I like a little Frank Sinatra".

He was surprised at the fact I didn't have a home in Chicago and that I really did just live out of a suitcase. "How does one end up being from Wyoming? And how did you end up here?" I was surprised at his curiosity considering he has seen so much and certainly seen people come in from all over the country to join the Navy. He even took an interest in the mundane life of a refinery.

We bitched about power point and peoples' presentation skills. He spoke about his Dad loading up on toilet paper when a storm was coming. "Just shows how many assholes there are in the world when people are loading up on toilet paper," the Admiral said.

I gave him grief about being an admiral and stuffed in economy. He said "yeah they won't let me upgrade, it's considered a perk. That's why you got to trick yourself out". He started showing me his gadgets...including his "space age" foam seat approved by NASA. This toy came about after a flight on air India where the padding had been removed and he was forced to sit on metal. This was the same flight where they landed and he said "I couldn't tell if we had landed or been shot down". He also spoke about being shot at in the first Iraq war.

The conversation continued on and I was surprised at how fast the time went and how grateful I was that he was there. I wanted to tell him what a savior he had been for me but the timing was never right. He had really eased my discomfort and calmed my fears on the flight. He also seemed to know a little bit about everything. In talking about soybeans he was in complete awe of what it takes to be a farmer. "I could never figure that out". His modesty was sincere though I'm sure if you can do what he does, you can figure out farming.

We slept a bit and chatted as we were served the scrumptious airplane breakfast and as we landed I realized we had never exchanged names. It didn't really matter, I suppose. It's unlikely I will ever see him again. But as he pulled his bag down and I realized that I should have known his name, and probably should have guessed it. It was marked in perfect military fashion on his bag and it was...Jim.

I could tell that he was kind of a Maverick in the Navy and not the stereotypical rigid type. Someone who does what he wants to and gains respect by doing so. I was so affected by my experience that I looked him up when I got to my hotel in Scotland. His biography can be found at the following link....http://www.navy.mil/navydata/bios/navybio.asp?bioID=391

Ummmm FIVE THOUSAND hours of flight time?

I made it to Scotland safely and found myself in the middle of an absolutely wonderful day. Blue skies all around, no cloud in the sky and perfect temperatures. This was the first day in a loooong time, people said.

I can't help but think Dad had some part in this so...Thank You, Dad.